For Susie

I am blessed that I had you Susie as my big sister. From my name, since Christopher wouldn't do for a girl, to all the ways you looked after me from then on. I remember you were always there, from the boy you beat up in boarding school for stealing my pen, to Andy at the car wash. If anyone tried to mess with me you were there to scare the crap out of them, including every boy I ever dated. Luckily Gil passed your test. I loved that you gave me the honor of being your maid of honor, and I was thrilled that you were able to be in my wedding even though that day you weren't doing well. I love that you have such a close relationship with Gil, that you can call and talk to him, and that he has become your brother in every way. You are one of the strongest people I know, one of the most dynamic and full of life. I remember the world war you started in boarding school. That school did not know what to do with you, I remember that you were the general of the girls team and then there were the boys teams and for weeks all you would here during recess is the rat-at-tat-tat of the automatic weapons. The teachers at first thought it was a fad that would pass but you are stubborn and so was he and so the war went on and on. You had guards pick me up from class to walk me to your dorm because as your sister they might take me hostage. The only way they could get the war ended was to have an assembly where you and the boys captain signed a peace treaty and everyone surrendered their weapons. I also remember how you would coach me to not cry when Mom and Dad left, how you would read to me their letters and how you would hold me when I was horribly homesick. I remember in California how you would look out for both Paige and I and keep us safe from the bullies. I also love the way you have given each of the kids a nick name that only you call them, and every Christmas you pick something out especially for them. Elizabeth and you have a special connection, and she adores you. She loves your stories of the African Lion Safari, and when you speak she is hanging on every word. I also know how hard it was for you to watch me go through my dark spells, the blame you have wrongly taken. You couldn't have done anything to prevent it, or lessen it. I know that you have had your own dark spells and even now are going through them, and I wish I knew more of what to do to help you. I do know that I am grateful that I got to grow up with you as my sister, that you were always there looking out for me, and beating up anyone that harmed me. That you were always there to make me laugh and to hold me when I cried. I always felt like such an ugly duckling and you always helped me feel pretty. So I am blessed because of Susie, and all she gave and sacrificed for me.