Amazing Love. . .

It is amazing to me how much God answers prayers and sometimes through our dumbest mistakes. Gil went up to see my parents a couple of week-ends ago. The kids had gone up and spent the night at their house, eating ice-cream and swinging on the chandeliers, and so he was picking them up. Truth be told I had promised to go on this adventure as well but for reasons still complex and unknown to me I paniced as the time drew close. So I didnt' go and spent some alone time here.

Well needless to say my mother was pissed. There really is no other way to describe it. She managed to get through dinner with only a few comments but Gil knew what was in the wind. He tried to escape to find shelter as quickly as possible but Hurricane Bertha was moving in quickly. Unfortunately he did not make it in time. As Susie held the chidren safely on the roof, he battled the hot air, winds and rising floods of emotion (dumping his own two bucketfuls in) that are my parents. In the chaos of such an event, considering all three are personalities that tend to bottle things up inside until a straw breaks their back and an explosion ensues, (however that usually results in a cease-fire and a time of peace and tranquility while everyone goes to the corner, licks their wounds and reasesses the situation), well apparently each of said member of the family was at the breaking point which resulted in a category 5 hurricane (Gil and Bertha) being classified as two in one since they both explode with a force unknown to man. Because of this chaos at the end Gil had spilled secrets of my life that I never had wanted them to know, they had gone into lapses of denial, tears, guilt, denial and then anger that he told them to begin with.

When he came home Jessica did inform me a huge discussion had taken place in which all children were sent outside. Or were all children inside and the real grown-ups outside? I haven't quite decided. So I knew something was up when Gil gingerly sat in front of me to tell me that he had something to tell me that I might not like. He was right, I was furious at him, and then furious at my mom for provoking him, furious at myself that I had such damaging secrets, furious and then devestated which is where I have remained as of late.

However this "bomb" of sorts which is how my sister described the aftermath, caused my parent's eyes to finally open. They have been living in denial about how bad my situation here is, and how much pain my family is in. So they went to counselling and worked some stuff out and now are willing to try to work stuff out with me too and try to come along side in the healing process. I never thought that would ever happen. I thought I could keep myself under raps until judgement day and then I have been hoping and praying that like Aslan did with Edmund, Jesus would take me aside quietly and rebuke me and my family would never need to know.

So I am still coping with them knowing, but I am also realizing that God works even in hurricanes and bombs of emotion to bring good and healing to His sheep and even more important I am realizing that I am truly one of His sheep.